


Treasures for Undeserving Men

by nonky



Category: Nancy Drew (TV 2019)
Genre: CW Nancy Drew Reboot, Gen, Season/Series 01
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-09
Updated: 2019-11-09
Packaged: 2021-01-26 11:53:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21373720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nonky/pseuds/nonky
Summary: It hadn't occurred to him he was leaving Nancy out and pushing her away. He'd thought of it as being strong. When she talked about her worries, both of them hidden from Kate, he gave her a hug and told her things would be okay. The flat, passive comfort was more of a brush-off in hindsight. It had told Nancy he couldn't give her the emotional care she'd really been trying to find.
Relationships: Carson Drew/Kate Drew, Nancy Drew/Ned Nickerson
Kudos: 9
Collections: Nancy Drew TV Series (2019)





	Treasures for Undeserving Men

Hyper-vigilance was a symptom of mental illness, and an asset once he'd realized his child was growing up smarter than him.

Carson Drew had approached fatherhood as diligently as he studied law or made time for his clients. He was piled high with obligations to other people, each of them important and in need. He had been fatigued during the early years, but Nancy's milestones had been concrete appointments in his schedule. He was there for his child, counting it a privilege. 

Later, once Kate was back at work, his role had more influence. Nancy had become his shadow, doing her own crayon and construction paper work in his home office. He took her on trips to the hardware and grocery store, and even the rounds of visiting clients for final signatures. Her precocious legal vocabulary might have gained him some clients impressed by his unofficial mini-assistant.

Nancy excelled, making his natural pride feel almost inadequate. She grew more like her mother every year, visible even through the gawky phases. She was beautiful and good. Her intellect wasn't put to waste because she saw times it could be in service to others. He'd had to scold her for her recklessness, but been secretly proud she could be selfless. She had an ability to follow patterns and solve puzzles he hoped might eventually lead to her own law career.

Kate had been the stricter parent. Carson knew he would give in sometimes. Half of his client meetings with Nancy's accompaniment had required a stop at Palmer's Parlour for ice cream because he wanted to make sure the town council had adjusted the proprietor's taxes. 

They were both so proud, but Kate was thrilled to have an independent daughter. He was more of a wreck about it. She was older than her years, having absorbed more of his professional stoicism than he'd intended. At birthday parties he'd find her networking with adults, quizzing them on the minutia of their jobs. She was growing up too fast for Carson's heart to take.

Her girl detective antics were troublesome, but at least he'd known no one would want to sentence a fourteen year old for breaking and entering to expose abuse in a nursing home. He and his wife had been firm when it was necessary. They'd taken away her phone and enrolled her in afterschool programs to occupy all her unsupervised moments. Nancy's time management for homework was probably a direct result of sneaking around snooping during that challenging year. She'd made a real enemy of Police Chief McGinnis, and held an answering grudge for him. 

Carson had been prepared to go as far as sending her to boarding school if she didn't learn prudence along with her capabilities. Kate had laughed at him, and kissed him gently. "She'd be gone a week and you'd lapse into a depression, sweetheart," she told him. "We'd have to go ask for her back in the middle of the night. I want Nancy under our roof as long as we can keep her itchy feet on the ground."

Age and ambition held the cure as much as parenting her. Nancy wanted to go to Columbia University, and had taken up more typical interests in dating and fashion. She had her friends and hobbies. Mysteries were a small part of her life, and she learned to give them only the time she could spare. Her questioning of authority was only as grating as a teenager's high horse stood absurdly tall. Principles were wonderful, but they didn't pay bills or offer much quality of life without compromises.

They were happy and whole, a family unit with three people fulfilled and supported in their future plans. He and Kate had meaningful, stable careers, and he had learned which clients to avoid for his own good mindset. Nancy would go on to do brilliantly at university, either Columbia or somewhere else. 

Kate's diagnosis had crippled him long before his wife was forced to stop working. He couldn't think about anything except doctors and test results. Carson had thrown money into supplements and trips to get specialists to see her. It wasn't so unusual a case, they were told, it was just very difficult to cure. Success rates were low, and research lagged behind because pharmaceutical companies didn't make that much money off people who tended to die inside a year. The hits piled on his psyche with every kind doctor laying out the hopelessness. 

He'd overspent long before the treatments, but the money couldn't matter next to losing his wife. Kate settled in to fight gracefully, and Carson did his best to pull himself together. There was still Nancy to think of, his wife reminded him daily. He would still be there, and he would still have their daughter to care for. He couldn't break down and fail as a father.

Neither he or Kate had come from money, and by the time she died the debts were substantial. Carson had stopped working entirely for long months, and had to bully Nancy to school. He glanced over her failed grades with tears in his eyes, but he couldn't judge her for having a hard time concentrating. They were watching the person who had been the making of both of them fade away in their living room. 

He got the better end of that final loss. Nancy was the only thing Kate could have left him as consolation, and his daughter was unfortunately left with his rambling comfort.

Her limping finish to graduate was an anticlimax to a year of tragedy. Carson was saddened to know he'd simply not been able to balance the needs of all of his family. Kate had to be first while she'd lived, and he was trying to fix his neglect of work and fatherhood. 

Work was more forgiving. Nancy had devoted herself to her mother's last days. She and Kate had been inseparable. Carson had to be the bad guy, sending her to class and reminding her she needed extracurriculars for her applications. He hadn't gone far enough to make her think of her own future. There should have been tutors and sitting her down at the table to work through boxes of SAT flashcards. 

He hadn't wanted to take away her time with friends or the dances and dates. Kate had loved to think of Nancy finding small joys somewhere in the midst of the grief. Maybe they had been unwittingly selfish as parents, using her vicariously to bring light to the situation. They could tell themselves she was doing okay.

His wife had been insistent she didn't want Nancy to know how much pain and indignity there was in dying. She hid it frighteningly well. Kate sometimes only just managed to hold back tears until their daughter was out of the house before she was twisting on the bed in agony. The moments until the drugs eased it were etched in Carson's mind. It wasn't how he wanted to memorialize his love. 

It hadn't occurred to him he was leaving Nancy out and pushing her away. He'd thought of it as being strong. When she talked about her worries, both of them hidden from Kate, he gave her a hug and told her things would be okay. The flat, passive comfort was more of a brush-off in hindsight. It had told Nancy he couldn't give her the emotional care she'd really been trying to find.

Kate's wishes had asked too much of him, he'd realized too late. He'd made sure Nancy wasn't there for the doctors and the treatments. He'd encouraged her to make other plans and try to continue with normal life. It had created an artificial divide, and he was stuck on the far side watching her go the wrong way in so many decisions. He could shout at her, but he had lost her safekeeping. 

It was too late to drive back by the time he'd finished his meetings, but he wasted hours sitting on the hotel bed and knew he couldn't sleep. He could provide a comfortable, safe house with her physical wants covered, but Nancy didn't need more time isolated and obsessing over death and the worst of people. Carson packed up hurriedly. He'd wanted to call her, but it was late. There was nothing in particular wrong. 

He was just worried, like he hadn't been since they day she'd been born. He felt her existence like a treasured, enormous responsibility. He was going to have to be the world's oldest living man so he never left her without family. They had a few relatives, but no one close. Nancy would be too proud to go to them for help. She already had little use for him.

He shouldn't have been so hard on her about dating Nick. He wasn't a bad kid. It was unfortunate his past trouble would reflect poorly on Nancy at a pivotal moment when her reputation was going to matter. 

Carson tuned the radio to something with music that was loud but not really enjoyable. It would break up the lethargy as his energy ran down, and hopefully keep him alert. He was glad for his Dad car. It matched his Dad anxieties and his Dad heartbreaks.

When he got home, he was going to be more understanding. He'd talk to Nancy and explain more specifically why it mattered who she dated. Nick had paid for his actions, but it was a small town. Newcomers with gaps of years where they were neither in school or working raised eyebrows. George Fan had her own mistakes to live down, and Bess Marvin seemed too nice to talk Nancy out of her careless moments. The stoner kid, Ace, was a little too scattered to be a good influence. 

He'd try again to talk to her about Karen, now that the shock was a little removed. The detective had tried to get the charges minimized with Nancy's cooperation, and his stubborn daughter had sided with her new boyfriend. Carson would sacrifice what needed to go to get Nancy free to pursue her future. He would even be receptive to breaking it off with Karen if it was the only way to make a difference. 

He was relieved when the town welcome sign passed on his right. He normally hated the tacky lighthouse cutout, but it was a part of the place. They needed locals to stay, and the locals needed tourists to support their hospitality businesses. He slowed for the residential speed limit. Driving through the sleeping town was the bittersweet experience he'd felt since he'd left highschool and moved away. Just enough stayed the same to make him miss what had changed.

The closed store windows he passed were flickers in his peripheral vision. Out of long habit, Carson didn't turn his head when the display of one window seemed to distort and bulge at the glass as if it would escape and chase him. He drove past the cemetery without flinching, his breath held until he was out of sight of gravestones. 

He pulled into the driveway with a tired sigh, next to the roadster. He should offer to pay Nick for the car repairs, at the very least. He wished the kid well, but not at Nancy's expense. Carson knew he should have sold the car by now, but Kate and Nancy loved it too much. 

He glanced at the back seat and couldn't make himself pick up the suitcase. He would get it later. He grabbed his briefcase and climbed out with a stiff gait. He would use all his mature life experience to give counsel to his toughest client yet. A father's patience endured best when it had to hold up. He would remember how to do it well, or relearn how to be Nancy's father.

Home would never be the same without Kate, but he felt the walls of the house like a return to privacy. He could show weakness there, and remind himself of all the lovely moments of his family. He could rally for the hardships that seemed to have targeted his loved ones. 

He took the stairs slowly, calculating how many hours of sleep he could fit in before he needed to be at work. Carson looked around at the top, his gaze fixing on Nancy's mostly shut door. She had left it open for light when she was smaller, and now it was more to let air conditioning in. He walked over to peek in, feeling the sentimental pull of tiny Nancy flopped out of her covers in his memory. 

She was wrapped up tonight, in the colourful sheet and Nick's arms. Carson checked his reaction back to an offended huff. It would do no one good to haul that boy out of her bed in the middle of the night. The hazard was about creating spectacle and not any worry she wasn't aware how to have a safe sex life. 

He turned away and went to his own bedroom. He would lose her if he was overbearing. Carson lay down in his clothes, turned to Kate's absence, and let his welling eyes spill over.


End file.
